Day 34: In which I am underwhelmed by Glee. *spoiler alert*

Why Glee kind of sucked this week:

1. Rachel’s bangs.

What was Lea Michele (or maybe, I guess, the like appearance designers or whatever) thinking when they cut her hair like that? It makes her normally beautiful brown hair look greasy. Even when it was pulled back, those little side pieces looked bad — like she had sideburns or something. On that note, GLEE SHOULD TOTALLY DO AN ELVIS EPISODE OMG.

2. Shue being mean.

Yes, that is the way Fox spells it. But really, every time Will tries to be mean or do something bad (even when it’s against Sue), it makes me feel betrayed. I know that doesn’t make sense, but he’s supposed to be a good guy! When he gets pissy, it’s not hot — it just makes me uneasy and I start to feel violated. Weird? Weird.

3. The song choices.

Wow, I feel like the Glee creators kind of screwed up on this one. One of the things that makes Glee so good is that they take classic songs and redo them in a modern, upbeat way (see: “Don’t Stop Believin'”, “Sweet Caroline,” et cetera). It’s passable if there’s a contemporary focus — like last season’s Lady Gaga episode — but otherwise, it’s just wrong. “Empire State of Mind” was alright I guess, but overall mediocre because it was more of a dance/rap deal than a song.  Glee is famous for its crazy long bold notes by Rachel and Finn — when they cut these out, the songs are lackluster.

So let’s talk about “Billionaire.” I HATE that song. Hate hate hate. It’s mindless, the guy singing has no talent, there’s no legitimate meaning to the song, and ‘frickin’ is a key part of the chorus. Glee chose that to introduce their new character? I’m disappointed.

And that finale piece? Seriously? They chose to end the SEASON PREMIERE with a sad solo song? Hmph.

4. The plot.

I think the worst thing overall was that at the end, I wasn’t left with the usual happy, optimistic, goosebumps-all-over feeling… I just felt sad. I feel bad for Beiste, I feel bad for Sunshine, and I feel bad for Finn. The club didn’t get any bigger and everyone was upset, which made me upset. Even Rachel was crying. :(

Tiny bits of redemption:

1. Next week will be awesome.

Britney Spears is like the perfect mix of recent and well-known music I was talking about before. Her music is practically considered ‘old’ by my generation (aka the target audience); knowing the songs the cast is singing really draws the viewers into the action. Plus, Britney Spears music is poppy and upbeat (and is sure to be linked with some great dance numbers)!

2. Sam.

Despite his absolutely ginormous mouth, the kid is hot. Amirite? He looks a lot like Austin Butler (read: very attractive) and despite the song choice, I do love his voice. I’m not so sure about his character’s personality and choices about football vs. Glee club; however, I am giving him a chance because he’s just so adorable. Where were the guys like that at Lake Mary? Heck, where are they at UF? (answer: riding the 120 bus to the Hub. Incidentally, this is my bus)

What else I’m thinking:

1. Rachel and Finn.

I want to see more of this relationship. I think they’re SUPER cute, but they’re not very intimate on-screen. Whether this is due to Finn’s general nonchalance policy or the introduction of these new characters, I don’t know, but I want to see them make outtttttttt. :)

2. Poor Artie.

Something you need to know about me: I really really like Artie. It’s a combination of the wheelchair thing and the glasses and the voice. I feel so bad for him. That final scene where he was watching the couple dance? Omg. I’ll give him a hug and attest endlessly that his abs are fine.

3. If the guy who watched Glee with us tonight in the Hume West 1 Lounge makes the same dumb comments he did this week next week, I am going to bust a cap.

You’re not funny, your sarcasm is moronic. That is all.

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